I was talking to a good friend of mines and it reminded me of things I forgot. Simple things that you find yourself abandoning, thinking you deserve a break. Truth is I’m not allowed to take a break. Those that aren’t meant to will never get a break. We can complain and try to come up with different kinds of reasonings but no one is forcing us to do anything. I’ve chose this, we’ve chose this and I understood what comes with agreeing to this. The gifts we’re given are truly not ours. The world owns it. Whatever I do, whatever we do isn’t for ourselves. We can try to convince ourselves other wise but it’s not going to happen. We can question why people get things we don’t and why our lives keep crashing down. We already know the answers. Certain things have to be taken away in order to focus on the bigger picture.

Now to shift it a little. It’s okay to be used to everything leaving or being taken away from you. Years of the same cycle can take a toll on you. I know I’m a fighter and I know we’re all fighters. As much as it hurts and unfair it may seems, prolonging doesn’t help. You have to let go of what you’re holding on to. It doesn’t mean you don’t love what you’re holding on to, if anything it shows how much you do, how much you’re willing to give up for the bigger picture. You’ll be able to breathe again, it may take a couple of breaths but it’s bound to happen. So get the parting gifts ready and take a deep breath. If whatever it is or who it is hates you for it. It’s okay. They’ll understand when it’s meant for them too. They’ll be fine without you. We’ll all be fine.

I can’t act like none of that was about me. So yeah I’ll be letting go and getting back on track. I promise y’all it gets better, you just have to have time to spare.

PS.. Sorry for the long text, you can’t ignore when clarity hits you.

02/21/09, 9:25PM PST